RIRL: celeb edition

being the celebrity gossip queen that i am, i used to look forward to mondays- the day our people magazine subscription came in the mail. now we don't get people in the mail anymore, so i have to stand in the corner discreetly at the grocery store and read to my heart's content, after which i usually buy a pack of gum so as to not be the lowest of all grocery magazine-hoarding freeloaders. now that i work at a nail salon, i am selfish and seeing as i work the front desk when the mail comes, i get to read about halle berry's mud-slinging custody battle with her ridiculously good looking ex before the paying customers do. i know. i must be the devil. so if you are wondering who will be watching the oscars tomorrow with bells and whistles on and who will be composing mental lists of best and worst dressed celebs, that will be me. and yes, i will be watching by myself because my usual oscars companion- mom- will be watching with her friends in some fancy hotel room. (happy birthday mom, i hope you're happy your daughter will be watching alone!)

so on this oscar sunday eve, i wish upon everybody lots of sparkly dresses and handsome men, especially myself.